Well Beaver, you’re one year closer to poopin’ in your pants and wandering around in a senile haze. I hope you have a better birthday than last year and maybe even get to relax a little today. Since I doubt that’ll happen, I’ll see if I can make my adventures from this week seem entertaining.
Weekly Words of Wisdom
I can do more than talk; I can pontificate!
- Nibbler, Niblonian Ambassador, and Protector of Earth.
Good Old Rocky Top
This week I traveled to Knoxville for a little soil and water sampling using a geoprobe rig. The trip went pretty well and it’s always nice to drive through Appalachia. The only problem with my last couple of trips to East Tennessee is that when I got back I realized how much Memphis sucks. Well, that’s not really fair. Memphis doesn’t suck, but there sure are a lot of people here that suck. Anyway, back to the story… The drive up to the smoky mountains was gorgeous as always, and my office for the day wasn’t too bad either.
The view from my truck while waiting on my drillers
After I finished my work and ate my 4th Subway sandwich in two days (I’m starting to feel like Jared only I’m getting fatter rather than thinner), I decided to drop in on my aunt and uncle who live in nearby Spring City, TN. I rolled up to his house and was blown away. It’s situated right on the Tennessee River and I felt like I should’ve gone through the house with a note pad to jot down ideas. There were so many great features to the house that seem like no-brainers, but still you rarely see them in typical homes. For instance; instead of having cabinets all over the kitchen, there were deep, wide drawers. It’s so simple yet genius. On the other hand, my uncle will never know the excitement of opening the Tupperware cabinet and being buried in an avalanche of cheap plastic storage containers.
The house with the river behind
I wasn’t there 2 minutes before I had a beer in hand and my uncle was showing me around the grounds. We hopped in his golf cart and took a spin down to the “lake.” Technically it’s the river, but where my uncle’s house is located, there’s a large area of water that’s essentially a still pool. Anyway, we rode down his back yard to the dock where he has his pontoon and bass boats in dry dock. Now, the reason they’re in dry dock and we didn’t go for a spin is because the guy who installed his dock system didn’t leave enough slack on the wires to lower the boats during the low season (the dammed Tennessee River level is kept low during certain times of the year to prevent flooding). I’ll admit I was disappointed that I couldn’t go out on the boat. To have a huge body of water and two perfectly good crafts that were trapped on a boat rack felt like having a cup and a keg, but no tap… How frustrating.
After a tour of the house and some fantastic Crawfish Monica, we sat out on the back porch with Daisy, the adopted foxhound, and smoked a Cuban and had some port while listening to some good tunes. It was a hell of a good way to top off a long day of field work.
Daisy
It’s not perfect but it’s the best I can do for a panorama of the back yard
The next morning as the sun was coming up over the river, I learned that the Vol Navy sails past my uncle’s house on weekends in the fall. I of course felt like he desperately needed to add cannons to his decorations and fire at will.
Weekly Words of Wisdom
I can do more than talk; I can pontificate!
- Nibbler, Niblonian Ambassador, and Protector of Earth.
Good Old Rocky Top
This week I traveled to Knoxville for a little soil and water sampling using a geoprobe rig. The trip went pretty well and it’s always nice to drive through Appalachia. The only problem with my last couple of trips to East Tennessee is that when I got back I realized how much Memphis sucks. Well, that’s not really fair. Memphis doesn’t suck, but there sure are a lot of people here that suck. Anyway, back to the story… The drive up to the smoky mountains was gorgeous as always, and my office for the day wasn’t too bad either.
The view from my truck while waiting on my drillers
After I finished my work and ate my 4th Subway sandwich in two days (I’m starting to feel like Jared only I’m getting fatter rather than thinner), I decided to drop in on my aunt and uncle who live in nearby Spring City, TN. I rolled up to his house and was blown away. It’s situated right on the Tennessee River and I felt like I should’ve gone through the house with a note pad to jot down ideas. There were so many great features to the house that seem like no-brainers, but still you rarely see them in typical homes. For instance; instead of having cabinets all over the kitchen, there were deep, wide drawers. It’s so simple yet genius. On the other hand, my uncle will never know the excitement of opening the Tupperware cabinet and being buried in an avalanche of cheap plastic storage containers.
The house with the river behind
I wasn’t there 2 minutes before I had a beer in hand and my uncle was showing me around the grounds. We hopped in his golf cart and took a spin down to the “lake.” Technically it’s the river, but where my uncle’s house is located, there’s a large area of water that’s essentially a still pool. Anyway, we rode down his back yard to the dock where he has his pontoon and bass boats in dry dock. Now, the reason they’re in dry dock and we didn’t go for a spin is because the guy who installed his dock system didn’t leave enough slack on the wires to lower the boats during the low season (the dammed Tennessee River level is kept low during certain times of the year to prevent flooding). I’ll admit I was disappointed that I couldn’t go out on the boat. To have a huge body of water and two perfectly good crafts that were trapped on a boat rack felt like having a cup and a keg, but no tap… How frustrating.
After a tour of the house and some fantastic Crawfish Monica, we sat out on the back porch with Daisy, the adopted foxhound, and smoked a Cuban and had some port while listening to some good tunes. It was a hell of a good way to top off a long day of field work.
Daisy
It’s not perfect but it’s the best I can do for a panorama of the back yard
The next morning as the sun was coming up over the river, I learned that the Vol Navy sails past my uncle’s house on weekends in the fall. I of course felt like he desperately needed to add cannons to his decorations and fire at will.
An East Tennessee sunrise
The drive back was nice but it didn’t take long to realize when I was back in Memphis. I wasn’t in the city limits for more than 3 minutes before some asshat in what looked to be an old cab painted Memphis State “reflex” blue sporting tractor wheels and condom-thin tires came flying up to a stop light at about 60. Of course, the light was red and nobody could go anywhere, but this mongoloid acted like he was gonna squeeze his 10 foot wide shitmobile through a 16 inch space. A few blocks further some uppity skank driving a car that she probably can’t afford came blowing past a yield sign and damn near t-boned me. Ah, welcome home.
Crawfish, Crawfish, Crawfish
This weekend we had another crawfish boil and it went pretty well, especially for me since I managed to stay coherent all the way to the bitter end. It was scheduled to be a BBQ team party and going away pre-party for my buddy RD who’s moving to Texas, but it ended up being a much smaller than anticipated. RD couldn’t get away from his packing, and only a handful of the Piglicious crowd made it. I was hoping for a better turn out, but I can’t complain. Ashley and I came pretty close to covering our cost, and we have a ton of peeled tails that will be excellent down the road in an etouffee. John brought over some additional eaters much to the delight of my fingers which were raw and burning from peeling tails. After they left it was up to Hill, Ash, John, Jasper, and I to try and float the remainder of the very buoyant Yuengling keg.
We made a valiant effort, but failed to finish it. I will note that the keg is light enough to lift with one hand, but I’d say there’s at least a 6 pack sloshing around still. The most amazing part of the weekend is that I had a keg and still managed to be functional at midnight. For any new readers or strangers, I have a reputation for taking marathon parties at a sprinters pace, and passing out on a floor no later than 7pm.
On Sunday, Ashley left for NOLA to do another interview, and I stayed home to clean up, and do a little work around the house. I hated that I couldn’t go with her, but I just have too much going on at work now to get away. Speaking of Which, I need to run. Happy Birthday Beaver and y’all have a good, safe week.
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